Why Pray for Those Who Hurt Us?

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Picture yourself having this conversation:

You: You tell me to forgive that person, Lord, and even pray for him, even though he hurt me. Why should I forgive him? Why shouldn’t I get even?

God: I hear you. You’ve been hurt. You’re hanging onto the hurt too long. Let it go. Let Me handle it. At judgment time, he will have to face Me.

You: Yeah, but You’re not going to condemn him, are You? You’re not going to make him suffer for what he did to me. He’s going to get off the hook, isn’t he? If he asks You to forgive him, You will, won’t You?

God: If he asks Me to forgive him, yes, I’ll forgive him…. Just like I have for you.

Christ tells us to have mercy – to forgive and pray for those who’ve hurt us. Why? Because doing so makes us more like Him. It softens our hearts to them and helps rid us of the bitterness we hold against them. Praying for them helps us see them from His perspective; we may see how their own hurt caused them to hurt us. Also, our prayers may lead them to change their ways. 

God’s mercy isn’t new to us, but Jesus’ message that God is merciful was a radical idea at that time. That’s because, in ancient times, the people thought that God wanted sacrifices, and the greater the sacrifice, the more pleased God would be. That’s why they offered Him their first fruits, sacrificed their best animals, and even sacrificed their children. But God used Abraham to try to teach the people that that wasn’t what He wanted. First, God wanted to see how far Abraham was willing to go to show his reverence for Him (see Genesis 22:1-19). Abraham proved that he would sacrifice even his son Isaac if that would please God. But God stopped Abraham from hurting Isaac – He didn’t want that sacrifice! This was the beginning of God’s trying to get through to us that He is a God of love and mercy. 

Jesus came to earth to drive home that point: He taught that loving in radical ways, such as forgiving those who’ve hurt us, was what God wanted. He commands us to be merciful, as He is. Our goal is to become more centered on Him and less on ourselves. Any sacrifices we make today, such as fasting during Lent or serving on church committees, are pleasing to God only if they strengthen our relationship with Him and make our hearts more like His. So, no matter what sacrifices we make, God doesn’t want them if we still insist on getting even with those who hurt us, cast judgment upon those who are different from us, or hold grudges. 

With His help, we can be merciful, as He is.

“I desire mercy, not sacrifice.” – Matthew 12:7  

“Lord, help me pray for those who’ve hurt me. Soften my heart. Make it more like Yours.”

Thank you for reading my reflection. © 2024 Gina Bedell     Comments are always welcome! 

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P.S.

Pray for peace at home, in Ukraine, Russia, the Middle East, and around the world. Donate toward a cause that tugs at your heart. Take care of those around you; take care of our planet. Pray for the families around the globe whose lives have been torn apart by war and natural disasters.

Fight War With Love This Lent

 

“You shall not stand by idly when your neighbor’s life is at stake.” –Leviticus 19:16.

It was chilling to hear this Scripture being read at Mass on Monday, with so many people in need of our prayers and help in Ukraine. (It’s important to note that this wasn’t read because of the war. The schedule of Scriptures used for Catholic Masses was set more than 50 years ago, after Vatican II.)

We also heard from Matthew’s Gospel. Here are parts of the passage:

“When the Son of Man comes in his glory… all the nations will be assembled before him. And he will separate them one from another… the sheep from the goats…” --Matthew 25:31-32

The word ‘nations’ jumped out at me like never before.  Also:

“…whatever you did for one of these least brothers and sisters of mine,

you did for me.” –Matthew 25:40

 This Lent, let’s fight war with love and offer our prayers and sacrifices for the people of Ukraine. Just as Jesus miraculously fed thousands of people when a boy humbly offered Him five loaves of bread and a few fish, so He can still work miracles in today’s world when we offer Him our prayers, fasting, and almsgiving for someone else’s benefit.

Remember, Lent is less about what we do and more about what God does with, for, and through us. Lent is not about performing self-serving acts of self-discipline. Rather, these weeks give us opportunities to let God pour His love into us so that we can love each other better. Our seemingly humble Lenten offerings become holy when He uses them to help others, and we are made holy by offering them.

We may be tempted to think, “I can’t give much, and I’m not one who spends hours in prayer; God can’t possibly do anything with what I have.”  Imagine if that boy had not offered his bread and fish to Jesus. Let’s remember that the amount of material goods we give, the amount of time in prayer we spend, and the kinds of sacrifices we make are not important. What matters is that we do and give everything with love.

Let’s remember, too, the immense power of intercessory prayer, proven when Moses pleaded with God on behalf of the unfaithful people:

“So the Lord changed his mind about the harm which he had threatened to do to his people.” –Exodus 32:14

Let’s pray for an end to war. Let’s love with our hearts and hands. Let’s ask God to take every instance of our self-denial and every donation of our time, our talents, our money or other items and use them, with His power, to help the people of Ukraine.

“Lord, accept our loving sacrifices. Save the people of Ukraine.”

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A Wedding, a Baptism, and Christmas

 In the 2002 romantic comedy, "My Big Fat Greek Wedding," Toula and Ian fall in love and want to get married. The problem is, Toula and her family are Greek, her father wants her to marry a Greek man, and Ian is not Greek. Ian wants to show Toula how much he loves her. He wants to share his life with her; he wants to share in everything that makes her her. He will do anything to be with her forever. So, he decides to become Greek.

In the scene of Ian's baptism into the Greek Church, the priest prays and dunks Ian's head under water three times. Toula and her brother Nicko are standing nearby, watching. Toula murmurs to her brother, "I'm just waiting for him to stop the ceremony and say to me, 'You are so not worth this.'" Nicko looks over at her, smiles, and says, "Yes you are."

Though there's an obvious difference of scale between them, we may draw an analogy between this part of the movie and Jesus' coming to Earth. God loves YOU so much that He became one of us; He shared in our humanity in every way except sin. Jesus, 'Immanuel,' 'God With Us,' lived among us and showed us His Love. He wants you to be with Him for all eternity and so He offered Himself as a sacrifice for you and for your salvation. While we prepare to celebrate Christmas, we also see His cross and resurrection. Through them, Jesus showed us that Love is more powerful than evil, and that even death itself couldn't put an end to Him -- His Spirit is still with us. In all of this, He lets us know, 'I'm doing this for YOU. I love you so much that I want you to be with Me forever. I'm offering Myself for you. You are so worth it.'

"No one has ever gone into heaven except the one who came from heaven -- the Son of Man. Just as Moses lifted up the snake in the wilderness, so the Son of Man must be lifted up, that everyone who believes may have eternal life in him. For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life. For God did not send his Son into the world to condemn the world, but to save the world through him." --John 3:13-17

"Lord, thank You for becoming one of us and crushing the power of death. Help me to love as You love."

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Die to Live

(March 31, 2021) This week, Christians are celebrating Holy Week. Many of us will participate in  Mass and other church services at least once before Sunday’s celebration of  Easter. 

The scripture readings for this week are familiar and we know the story.  Sometimes what’s familiar can become routine or humdrum and so, to combat  that attitude, I wanted to look at Holy Week as if for the first time. I was searching  for a way to understand it better intellectually so I could comprehend it deeper  spiritually. (This was in line with an earlier reflection I wrote about moving our  faith from our heads to our hearts.) I’d like to share with you a few thoughts that  came to mind surrounding Christ’s passion, death, resurrection, and ascension.  This is a simple explanation; it’s not very profound, and it’s not meant to be a  lesson in catechism. I hope that my sharing these images helps both you and me  wrap our heads around what we call the Paschal Mystery, and fosters a more  meaningful Holy Week and joyful Easter for all of us. 

First, I had to understand that, throughout history, people had been offering  animal sacrifices to God to atone for their sins. These sacrifices had to be done  repeatedly over time because sinning against God is a grave matter, and no  animal sacrifice could sufficiently repair the damage done by sin to the relationship between God and the people. Jesus, in His love for us, offered  Himself to be the perfect sacrifice to forgive sin -- everyone’s sins -- once and for  all. And so in humility He became a man to live among us, to show us that God  loves and forgives us, and to teach us how to love each other (see Matthew 5). Jesus knew His message wouldn’t be received well by everyone, and that what He  said and did would make some people angry enough to want to kill Him (see John  11:45-53). Out of love for us He obeyed the Father’s plan. He willingly became the  sacrifice; He took the sins of the world upon Himself on the cross and became  “the Lamb of God, Who takes away the sin of the world” (John 1:29). 

Now, here are the images that came to mind while I considered all of this. Right  before His death, Jesus talks about a grain of wheat needing to die in order to live 

and become many seeds (see John 12:24). This is true of other plants, too. Their  seeds have to be buried in order to become fruitful plants. Some things don’t  have to die but do have to be broken open for their glory to shine. For example, a  geode looks like an ordinary rock on the outside; cut it open and we see the  magnificent colorful design inside. Eggs, peanuts, and sunflower seeds all have to  be broken open to be useful to us. 

We believe that Jesus was born fully human and fully God. His divine nature caused Him to be filled with all of God’s love, joy, peace, hope, etc. His human  nature meant He could show and share God’s love, joy, peace, etc., only as His  body allowed Him to. Specifically, He could be in only one place at one time. 

When Jesus was beaten and crucified, His body was ripped open by the scourging,  the crown of thorns, the nails, and the sword. As I picture all of this happening, I  imagine all that love, joy, peace, and all the rest escaping the confines of His body  and being flung out upon the spectators at Calvary and the whole world. Similar to how a seed dies so that a tree can grow from it, Christ willingly gave up  His body so that His Spirit inside could ‘escape,’ in a sense. In other words, Christ  had to be broken open, killed, and then raised up so that the power of God’s love,  peace, joy, and all the rest can be showered down upon the world. This  ‘showering’ is the Spirit, the Gospels, all of scripture and the sacraments, that propel His love, peace, joy, etc., forward into history. 

Through His resurrection, Jesus proves that love is stronger than evil; sin and  death no longer have power over us. Death doesn’t get the last word. And,  through His resurrection and ascension back to heaven, Jesus is no longer limited  by a physical body. He can be everywhere, at any time. We can sing for joy  because He is with us now and always! If we let Him, He will put His Spirit into our  minds and hearts; He will equip us to fight evil and spread His love to the world. Hallelujah! 

I hope this imagery helps you as much as it helped me to better understand the  immense love behind Christ’s passion, death, resurrection, and ascension. May  we all have a blessed Holy Week and a Happy Easter! 

“Praise be to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ! In his great mercy he  has given us new birth into a living hope through the resurrection of Jesus Christ 

from the dead, and into an inheritance that can never perish, spoil or fade. This  inheritance is kept in heaven for you.” 

1 Peter 1:3-4 

“Lord, help me grasp the magnitude of Your love, and inspire me to spread it to the world.” 

This article is a personal reflection by Gina Bedell © 2021. It and other reflections written by her invite  the reader to ponder a given topic and then seek deeper answers through prayer, additional spiritual  reading, and/or consultation with clergy or other persons who may guide the reader to a deeper faith  and understanding of God’s love and will for their life.